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I have moved - I can now be found at Cathy @ Still Waters
Living, loving, Laughing and Travelling as much as possible. Come along and join in my life and travels - I'll be happy to have you there with me.

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

The Irish Medical Dictionary

I'm sure my rellies in Belfast would think this funny - but then again maybe they mayn't  lol


Irish Medical Dictionary

Artery.............................The study of paintings

Bacteria.........................Back door to cafeteria

Barium............................What doctors do when patients die

Benign............................What you be, after you be eight

Caesarean Section.........A neighborhood in Rome

Catscan.........................Searching for Kitty

Cauterize.......................Made eye contact with her

Colic...............................A sheep dog

Coma.............................A punctuation mark

Dilate..............................To live long

Enema...........................Not a friend

Fester............................Quicker than someone else

Fibula............................A small lie

Impotent.........................Distinguished, well known

Labour Pain...................Getting hurt at work

Medical Staff..................A Doctor's cane

Morbid............................A higher offer

Nitrates..........................Cheaper than day rates

Node...............................I knew it

Outpatient......................A person who has fainted

Pelvis.............................Second cousin to Elvis

Post Operative...............A letter carrier

Recovery Room.............Place to do upholstery

Rectum..........................Nearly killed him

Secretion.......................Hiding something

Seizure..........................Roman emperor

Tablet.............................A small table

Terminal Illness.............Getting sick at the airport

Tumor...........................One plus one more

Urine.............................Opposite of you're out

Yes I know its a groaner

3 comments:

  1. Well, these are hilarious -- I see many of these terms many times every day in the work I do. I have a cousin who is "half Irish:, not sure if she would find them so amusing. I, however, am not any part Irish at all.

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  2. I would say that this dictionary would apply to those living in the backwoods of the deep south .... but some of the words were too big!

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  3. And a great "groaner" to boot! Oh dear, these really are something else. Thanks again for making my day.

    ReplyDelete

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Take care
Cathy